Women have so many balls in the air at any given moment. We’re juggling work, family, friends, love, life…and mostly ourselves. But roles and responsibilities are not all we’re trying to balance – many of us are also in a constant flux between our feminine and masculine energies. Let’s power up our feminine, tap into that innate essence within and live the happiest (and hottest) lives we can! And guess what – it’s life-changing when you do…
If you’re anything like me, and have to regularly step into your more masculine qualities of independence, action, and logic during your work day, you’ll be familiar with spending the major part of your week not honouring your feminine essence as much as you could. As women, most of us feel happier when we live in our ‘divine feminine’ energy (think creativity, passion, empathy, emotional, intuitive) and this is something that is innately in all of us. Every woman has access to this uniquely feminine energy, it’s simply a matter of ‘uncovering’ it if it’s been buried for too long, or tapping into it if you’re unfamiliar with your own feminine essence. When you know how, you’ll feel alive, dynamic, sexy, powerful, vulnerable, capable, creative…the list goes on.
So how do we step confidently into our more feminine selves in a world where there seems to be an epidemic of women feeling the pinch of ‘not good enough’ or ‘less than’? Well, beautiful women – allow me to shed some soft, feminine light on the subject and start by saying I’m embracing my vulnerability, my authenticity, dancing more, writing more, creating more, hugging more, spending more time naked and embracing a little secret weapon commonly known as the Jade Egg. GASP! No, really, we all need to spend time getting know ourselves more intimately and dropping back into the feminine flow. Trust me, get in the flow and you’ll discover your sexiest and most powerfully feminine self yet!
But, don’t just believe me – here’s my chat with author and teacher of all things ‘girl power’ – the divine and wonderful Tara O. I promise you’ll feel more feminine, more passionate, more creative, more inspired and more powerful in your womanhood just by reading this. And keep this in mind when you do…Girls compete with each other, women empower one another.
Now, go forth and BE WOMAN! ROAR!!!!
My Chat With Tara O – Author of Wildly Irresistable
Your wish is that every woman feels empowered, loved, sexy and worthy –what do you think are the main barriers for women individually, and in society to achieving these things…
There is an epidemic of women (of all ages) feeling as though they are ‘not enough’. Why is that? Why as a society are we failing so terribly at lifting women up and instead, bringing them down. We can point fingers at the media and advertising and so on, but I believe it’s much bigger than that. It’s the suppression of women on a global scale that has formed the foundation of our womanhood today. The idea that women are ‘less than’ is in our blood, in our cultural messaging, in our world. It’s now up to us to change that, to rise above it and claim back our power. We as women have a tendency to be our own worst enemy. When was the last time you said something nice to yourself, showed yourself some kindness? The opportunity for comparison and competition is everywhere, the impossible quest for perfection! The perfect life, body, sex life. Social media of course doesn’t help.
What has been your personal journey to do this kind of work with other women?
I ran around the world trying to find something/somewhere/someone to make me happy, to fill the enormous whole in my heart. I was battling with depression, an eating disorder and then later self harm. It was a very difficult time. But I wouldn’t change any of it. My life has lead to me to my work today. It has allows me to share knowledge from my own experience rather than advice just absorbed from books. I know the importance of this work because it saved my life, and so it’s important to me to share it.
What is ‘divine femininity’and ‘feminine essence’ (in a nutshell!)? Is this something that can be learned? Or is it a case of all women possessing this and learning how to reconnect with themselves?
We are all made up of energy. It’s the life force in us. It’s our vitality, our vibe, it’s what we live from and share with the world, our dynamic quality. We have inside all of us both masculine and feminine energy or essence. However as females, most of us (but not all) feel happier when we live predominately from our divine feminine – the qualities that define our feminine energy. Feminine essence or feminine energy (I use both terms interchangeably) is characterised by some of the following qualities: Intuitive, creative, passionate, nurturing, receptive, collaborative, empathetic, emotional. Every single woman on the planet has a feminine essence and has access to it. More often than not it’s buried underneath the fear of ‘being a woman’.
What can women expect in the classes you run?
Oh, I love my workshops! So much magic happens when women come together, dropping their masks and opening up to one another. It’s so powerful and healing. I run several different workshops. Great Sex Matters – where we look at the power of healthy our own healthy sexuality. The S-series, a two part workshop that explores shame and guilt around our sexuality as women and ultimately empowering woman to reconnect to their bodies and dance into their authentic, sexy and empowered self! I also do a full day workshop in which we dive really deep into the concept of divine femininity.
Is your teaching based on any specific methodology? Tantra? Yoga? Spirituality? Tell us a little about your specific modality…
My life philosophy is basically a giant bag of Pick n Mix. I don’t identify with just one religion or spiritual modality. Instead, I like to explore all of them and apply what feels right for me. I’m also interested in scientific explanations/research as well. I love investigating and learning from different traditions and teachings. I respect them all but at the end of the day, I follow my heart and listen to my intuition.
The Jade Egg is a bit of a secret weapon? What’s so special about this?
The Jade Egg is the ultimate tool to reconnect to your sexual organs. To bring awareness and consciousness back to the vagina. Many of us don’t give our poor vaginas much love and attention and can experience numbness or very little connection at all down there. By using the Jade Egg we are retraining ourselves to feel the subtle sensations within us. We also strengthening the vaginal muscles which is also wonderful for sexual sensitivity increasing our capacity of greater orgasms! We are learning to activate our pleasure pumps (pubococcygeus muscles) which will help activate your sexual pleasure and sexual energy.
What are five things women can do to start feeling powerful and irresistible right now?
1. Connect back to your body.
2. Spend time naked.
3. Reclaim your right to sensual pleasure.
4. Affirm yourself every chance you get!
5. Stop comparing yourself to everyone else.
What role to Affirmations and Intentions play in your teachings and in everyday life?
I love affirmations and the power that comes from great intentions. Your thoughts directly affect your reality so it’s important to be conscious of them. During the working week I have a tendency to become exhausted from living too much in my masculine energy (running a business does that!) which can really suck the joy out of my day and the spark from my creativity. So to help balance things out, I choose my intention for the day based on how I want to FEEL rather than what I want to DO. Such as, “Today I will infuse love and laughter into everything I do ”or “Today I will be loving and kind towards myself. I suffer from anxiety, so overwhelm is very easy for me. It’s not uncommon for me to have to stop several times during the day, place my hand on my heart and tell myself “I am Safe” and “I am supported by love”. Also I still have that nasty mind chatter that pops up every now and again. The voice that tells me I’m not good enough or that I will “fail”. I don’t believe I will ever be able to get rid of it, but I have learnt to manage it. I use affirmations like; I am worthy, I’ve got this, I’m loved etc to fight back against that pesky, pointless voice!
Body image and self-acceptance seem central to a woman tapping into her feminine essence, how do you help women to accept, appreciate and love their bodies?
Gratitude, Gratitude, Gratitude. Finding the power in your female body, the gifts within it. I encourage women to shift their perspective a little. Instead of viewing themselves from the outside, begin to look from within. Look for the pleasure it is cable of, the delight it can provide, the adventures. Learning to love your body is hard, but it’s possible. It just requires a promise to yourself of ferocious kindness, of unwavering love.
Vulnerability is a gift – one that many people fear. Could you share your thoughts on this?
To allow yourself to be fully seen as you are, warts and all. The power of standing up and saying “This is who I am, I’m not perfect, I still stumble and fall but I’m learning and I’m ok with that” is liberating! It’s truth at its deepest level and allows real, genuine connection to happen. It also allows you to take risks and to be creative. To put your message out in the world and bare your soul. I love this quote by Dr Sues
“Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don’t matter. And those who matter don’t mind.”~ Dr. Seuss.
“Beauty and seduction, I believe, are nature’s tools for survival, because we will protect what we fall in love with”- Louie Schwartzberg…Falling in love with yourself, self-seduction are keys to happy, irresistible women – what kinds of daily rituals can we undertake to fall in love with ourselves?
I love the magic of rituals! Kindness is key. Speak nicely of yourself as often as you can, compliment yourself. Make that a daily practice. I also take regular time out during the day to connect back in with myself. To step out of the rush of the day and take a breath. I like to sit outside or do some deep breathing, anything that slows me down. I use water as a cleansing agent for the day. I soak in the tub or stand under the shower and let the water wash me back into softness. I let it wash away any hard edges or stress from the day and after I show my body some love and gratitude by doing the body love practise in my book.
What is your ‘flow’? How can we detect if we’re in our out of our flow and get back into it?
Your flow is when everything is in sync. Your heart, body and mind. Everything is working together, listening and responding and serving one another. You will know when your out of flow – one part of you will let the rest know! Your body may become fatigued, you may feel grumpy and irritable, experience zilch libido or feel dull and lifeless. There swill be no ‘juice’, no spark in you. I promise you will know. To get back into your flow, firstly you need to listen to what you need. It maybe some time out in nature, disconnecting from the business of the world. It maybe some love from a special someone or some form of pleasure. Ask yourself what you need, and then go and get it.
Tara O hosts a range of workshops and her ebook ‘Wildly Irresistable’ is available here
How do you tap into you feminine essence? Share your experiences below…