How dating has changed (for the better) since the pandemic, reports Higher Love author Jordanna Levin.
I know, I know you’re thinking what kind of a misleading headline is that? As if self isolating, social distancing, venue restrictions, border closures and the latest face covering accessory we’ve all been sporting has upped our chances of finding love (or at the very least a hot date), but please I urge you to stay with me here.
You see, 2020 was a year that, whether we’d like to admit it or not, changed us all. Our priorities shifted, we gained new perspectives on tired old habits and when many of us were isolated from family and friends we truly realised the value of connection.
In a plot twist that perhaps no one saw coming the strongest connection that grew during 2020 was the one we have with ourselves. We were given time and space to work out who we are (for many of us sans work and social commitments), what lights us up, what we truly want from a relationship and what we will no longer compromise on (and if you didn’t get around to asking yourself these questions there’s still time).
We also slowed down the experience of dating (yes we had no choice) and I believe that this might have been one of the biggest silver linings of the year. For those who chose to still actively date (even during lockdown), dating via Zoom became our most viable option.
Across the globe potential suitors were primping their faces and picking out their favourite tops while sporting trackies and bed socks beneath the exposure of their computer screen. While at first Zoom dates felt disconnected, isolating and how do you say… ummm unsexy af, they actually created more chances for intimacy and connection than we could have predicted. Again, stay with me…
Suddenly being forced to create connection without having physical contact prioritised the value of communication and truly getting to know someone, and not just wanting to jump their bones (no that there’s anything wrong with that). This is a level of intimacy that is easy to skip over when we have the freedom to be enchanted by physical chemistry, but funnily enough many of the women that I have spoken to have said that the physical chemistry via Zoom is even stronger because it adds the element of wanting something simply because you can’t have it. When you finally do get to meet in the flesh the anticipation is so strong that there’s an intensity and passion that may not have been there if you had the pleasure of a simple kiss hello on the cheek.
Gradually getting to know someone via zoom has also given us an opportunity to spot those red flags before the cloudiness of sexual intimacy convinces us that their lack of self awareness, inability to listen or their penchant for hunting peacocks for sport is something that you’re willing to compromise on.
As restrictions are slowly lifting around Australia and we’re able to get back out in ‘the wild’ and date, I do hope that we’re able to learn from the year that ripped intimacy and connection out from under us. May we prioritise communication, really value the beauty of physical contact and most importantly get excited again about something as simple as grazing hands across the dinner table.
Higher Love by Jordanna Levin (seen above in the hero image), published by Murdoch Books. You can purchase Jordanna’s book via this link.
HIGHER LOVE BY JORDANNA LEVIN
Higher Love takes dating and flips it on its head, inviting you to get curious about the role you play in your own love story and helping you strengthen your personal vibration to attract the love that you deserve. This is a book about dating, and figuring out who you are, what lights you up and how you want to feel in love.