Aries: If you love cosy nights in and moon lit strolls give Aries a miss. However, if you admire someone who is straightforward, prefers dirty talk to sweet nothings and gets their ya-yas sky diving buck naked, read on. Extroverted and honest, Rams cut to the chase, but that’s not to say they don’t enjoy the thrill of it – they love a challenge, so don’t spoil their fun by being too available. They also enjoy a good debate (their preferred MO when it comes to foreplay), confidence and bravery, so arm yourself with witty comebacks, give as good as you get and leave your inhibitions at home!
Taurus: Taureans LOVE food, sex and money (not necessarily in that order) and are slaves to their finely honed senses. Nothing says ‘I love you’ like sticky date pudding, a lovingly drawn candle lit bath and a conscientious back rub. If you’re after tempestuous love a la Elizabeth Taylor and Richard Burton or endless spontaneity you’re bucking up the wrong bull. Taureans are conservative creatures who prefer a harmonious, hassle-free existence and always have a contingency plan. However, being complacent or boring as bat poo isn’t going to win them over – a sense of humour and enjoyment of the simple things in life will.
Gemini: Impulsive, fun-loving and nuttier than a pecan pie, Geminis live for the moment, partly because they loathe planning but mainly because they possess the boredom threshold of a 5-year-old on a red cordial binge. Nab their attention, and eventually their heart by being interesting, enthusiastic and friendly. Pull out your A material but don’t play all your cards at once – leave a few surprises up your sleeve. Young at heart and a tad insane, but intellectual nonetheless, the best way to impress them is by breaking into song in the supermarket, flashing your privates in public and completing the cryptic crossword, preferably all at once!
Cancer: Crabs are the ultimate homebodies and while they don’t mind hitting the town they much prefer snuggling up near a cosy fire with a glass of red and home cooked meal. As sentimental, incurable romantics, Cancers are easily wooed by traditional trappings – flowers, chocolates, love letters – but are conscious of the fact that they wear their heart on their sleeve. Which is why potential suitors must pass a rigourous screening process. Crabs are also very family oriented and admire people with similar values, so it’s a case of love me, love my family. – or at least put up with them once a fortnight.
Leo: Leos will settle for nothing but the best so you must convince them that you’re top notch. Wallets also serve as quite an aphrodisiac. Forget everything you’ve read – in this instance, size does matter, which kind of sucks if you’re monetarily challenged. If that’s the case, lavishing attention on your feline and treating them like royalty will appease and suffice. They are also very tactile and playful, so showing them some affection and getting in touch with your inner big kid will have them purring. The main thing you have to remember is that Kittens are low maintenance – provided they are adored.
Virgo: As one of the most intelligent and impeccable signs Virgos are highly critical, so don’t beat yourself up if you don’t cut the mustard – that’s their job. They won’t expect you to be as tidy, efficient or flawless but they admire self-improvement and will applaud your efforts, albeit silently, to go to the gym, attend NLP classes and make sure your personal hygiene is above reproach. Make sure you’re punctual, well-dressed and well-mannered. Virgos are embarrassed by public impropriety – so leave the dirty jokes and nape nuzzling for behind closed doors. However, they do have a devilish sense of humour so don’t hold back on the dry wit.
Libra: Having earned a solid reputation as social butterflies Librans are fun, tactful and meld to suit the occasion. Therefore, they look for someone whom they can take anywhere, from a rugby match to the opera. They are also well-versed in social etiquette so turning up empty handed or dressing inappropriately will go down on your permanent record. Flattery may be lost on others but commenting on a Libran’s eye colour, jacket or throaty laugh works wonders, and as the peace lover of the zodiac affection, tenderness and harmony will also woo them – behaving in a confrontational or aggressive manner will send them packing.
Scorpio: Yes, everything you’ve read is true – the way to a Scorpios heart is not through their stomach but via their most valued organ and I’m not referring to the brain! These intensely sexual creatures love nothing more than raw passion – the only thing they ask is that you are man or woman enough to handle their all-consuming magnetism. Scorpios admire doers, not talkers so don’t mention things you are unable to deliver or you’ll be immediately stripped of respect. Scorpios are drawn to strength and power – but don’t even think of trying to fake it – show your vulnerability, loyalty and decency instead.
Sagittarius: As the Marco Polos of the zodiac Saggies live to explore every facet of life and fly by the seat of their pants, so never expect definitive RSVPs when planning for tomorrow, let alone next week. The quickest way to capture a Saggie’s attention is with a plane ticket or a sexy accent, which poses a problem if you’re a native who’s unable to whisk them off to a far away destination. However, trading travel anecdotes, as well as having an optimistic spirit, sense of spontaneity and appreciation of adventure will do the trick. Bring your lust for life – and passport.
Capricorn: Capricorns are indeed a class act and while secretly turned on by status and power they are equally put off by vulgar displays of extravagance. So give them a subtle peak at your trump or platinum card without resorting to flashy tactics. Yes, these complex creatures are a hybrid of elegance and salt of the earth, therefore modesty and unpretentiousness are equally as important as sophistication and refinement. They’re also a good-humoured, hard-working bunch who appreciate scathing one liners, ambition, tenacity and integrity. Intelligence, attentiveness and a knowledge of the finer things in life will also keep you in good stead.
Aquarius: Aquarians love all manner of novel things – electric cars, star trek conventions, hermaphrodites – so the best way to woo this eccentric creature is by standing out from the crowd and showing your individuality, originality and, most importantly, open-mindedness. Aquarians may have firm opinions but they loathe those who are judgmental or unwilling to listen to others. They’re also extremely sociable creatures, however, as they are fiercely independent they prefer to avoid the limelight and hang out on the periphery where they can observe, yet little is expected of them. Aquarians love their freedom, so accompany them on the ride but be wary of cramping their style.
Pisces: These idealistic dreamers seek, and usually find, all-consuming, struck by lightning, love at first sight romance. Led by their hearts and slaves to their hormones, most Fish have been twice bitten but that doesn’t deter them from their quest. Sharing a degree of their compassion, selflessness and sincerity is required, as well as an affectionate disposition and good sense of humour. Having a great imagination is also a big plus -Pisceans jump at any opportunity to leave daily tedium behind by indulging in fantasy – as is a proficient knowledge of a musical instrument, knowing how to master a mean bouillabaisse or a damn fine foot massage!