We’ve all been taught that life should be a certain way; that we perform our function in society as working contributors. Sacrificing the majority of our waking hours for a job is not a negotiable term if we want to support our families. We work to provide for our families, yet in consequence, we lose the time we get to spend with our loved ones.
This is the status quo. But it doesn’t mean we have to live by it. The truth is, we shape our futures based on the narratives we form. If your narrative is that I have to get a well paying job and that will be what my entire life will be about, then that is exactly what your entire life is going to be about. Often, we fear breaking out of the status quo, because we are afraid of the unknown, as well as leaving the herd. Overcoming that obstacle, and being empathetic towards ourselves, our own desires, and recrafting our own sacred story will bring us closer to our own version of the truth. That is the truth that we will become extremely successful, abundant, healthy, and happy.
It is through sacred storytelling, that one woman built a community of leaders that are manifesting their dream lives. She has helped many entrepreneurs change what they thought was impossible, to inevitable. Adriana Monique Alvarez is an international bestseller author of How To Start A Six Figure Publishing Company and the USA Today bestseller author of The Younger Self Letters. She helps women build successful publishing businesses, and offers a trove of wisdom on how we can take the step towards not just living, but thriving in our professional and personal lives.
Changing Life’s Narrative: We live the stories we tell ourselves
Our narratives shape the way we act and in a big way, what we become. People that envision themselves to be lawyers someday, will study more diligently, engage in debate in their social circles, and might even dress more tactfully. There are narratives that propel us forward, and there are narratives that hold us back. These are known as limiting beliefs. Alvarez gives an example of a father that ponders on if he could home school his son. In the first scenario, his limited belief in himself and his abilities is in consequence of the broader narrative in society- that is you need a teaching degree to teach. According to his story, he doesn’t think he can finish his work in 3 to 4 hours and teach his son, therefore, he never will.
In a second scenario, Alvarez challenges the father to adopt a different story. Maybe he can finish what he needs to get done in 3 to 4 hours. He can teach his son the essentials of reading and writing, and more so, what he wished someone had taught him. When he starts changing the narrative from “I can’t” to “I can”, this fundamentally changes how he is going to act in the future. Now that it seems possible, it’s about what I have to do to accomplish it.
This case can be applied to many different situations, whether that’s pursuing a higher degree, a business, being more present with family or cultivating a strong relationship.
Forming a Community: We become who we surround ourselves with
As social mammals, we crave group interaction and bonding. This is why most of us adhere to societal standards, such as pursuing a ‘stable’ job and buying a home at a certain age. It can be quite disheartening and unmotivating when our community does not support our goals. Everyone needs a support system such as a community. It can serve as a grounding force that reminds us to keep going when we face waves of self-doubt or obstacles. By surrounding ourselves with like-minded people, it can help us achieve our own goals, knowing that others have done it too. This is a big part of the transformation from impossible to inevitable. Research shows that our self-efficacy, our belief in our own ability to master something, increases substantially if we resemble someone who’s mastered the thing we want to accomplish.
Community sits at the core of Alvarez’s business. She’s built the foundation of her business coaching and connecting like-minded women to achieve prosperity through creating their own businesses. She believes that without the support of other female entrepreneurs, her business and others would not be as successful. Finding her calling through storytelling has allowed her to share her journey globally, and compound the effect it has on others through her successful publishing business.
We cultivate our success in our own way
How we gravitate towards success, achieving our most desired lives, is through intention. Once we have an intent in mind, we can start breaking down our mental boundaries, challenging our limiting beliefs, and shaping a narrative that will lead us to our goals. It is possible to rewire our minds to think more abundantly, creatively, and courageously, to come up with solutions to how we are going to achieve that goal. The second way to manifest this dream is through community, by surrounding yourself with people that support your narrative. With these two tools, you will be well on your way to breaking out of the metal cage, and living a purposeful life.