Everyone Should Have Controlled Tantrums, Former AFL Player Says

Scream Anger Tantrum
Alice Duthie

Lifestyle Writer

Jan 06, 2023

Andrew Jobling, former St Kilda FC player, is an attention-seeking middle child. From a young age, tantrums were commonplace as he attempted unsuccessfully to gain attention in other ways. In fact, it was an unsuccessful tantrum, followed by running away from home, that led him to think about a more tangible way to gain attention.

It was at a young age he had the thought that if he were a famous footballer, he would have all the attention he wanted.

This thought started him on the journey to playing professional football for seven years in the 1980s, a journey which is described in detail in his newest book, T.E.A.R.S. of Joy. Fast forward the clock to March 2020, Andrew, at that time, author of seven published books, and an in-demand public speaker in high schools and for large companies, faced the same crisis the rest of the world faced. A global pandemic.

Andrew says, “Within a 24-hour period, as Melbourne went into lockdown number one, I lost about 10 paid speaking gigs, one after the other, representing tens of thousands of dollars of income. At that moment, I slid down the wall and dissolved into an almighty tantrum.”

As a result of this tantrum, and with a clearer mind, Andrew asked himself the question, “what do I do now?”

In that moment of desperation, he found clarity, and then very quickly transitioned his speaking business online and had the best two years he has ever had as a speaker, author, mentor and now podcaster. If not for that tantrum, Andrew does not believe he would have had the vision or made the decision that transformed his business and life.

He explains, “Everyone should schedule a tantrum at certain times in their life, to release pent up emotion and help gain clarity about what is truly important.”

Andrew has published his eighth book, T.E.A.R.S. of Joy during COVID, and in it he discusses the power of positivity harnessing emotion in our lives.

T.E.A.R.S of Joy by Andrew Jobling

Here are Andrew’s five steps to having the perfect tantrum:

  1. Schedule it. In other words, allot a short amount of time, and a suitable time to do it, and do it well.
  2. Let it all out. Don’t hold back or half-ass it. Cry, scream, jump up and down and pound the floor. It is amazing how good it feels.
  3. Limit the time. Keep to the allotted time, and as soon as that time is up, get up dust yourself off and get ready to find a solution to the situation with a much clearer mind.
  4. Ask the right question. This is critical, the right question will open your mind to options, solutions, and strategies. A great question is, “I can’t do it this way anymore, how can I do it?
  5. Take action immediately. In the moment you ask the question, your mind will start to feed you with ideas. Take action on those ideas in that very moment.

“A healthy and controlled tantrum can be just the thing you need to get through a challenge you feel frustrated by and stuck in,” explains Andrew.

T.E.A.R.S. of Joy is available from all online bookshops including Amazon, Booktopia and Barnes & Noble.

For more information visit www.andrewjobling.com.au


By Alice Duthie

Lifestyle Writer

Alice Duthie is a beauty and lifestyle writer for The Carousel. She is currently studying a Bachelor of Commerce at The University of Sydney, majoring in Marketing and Business Information Systems.



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