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Hermès In The House: The New Apple Watch

The consumer steamroller that is Apple officially announced the aforementioned marvel just this morning. And of all the things that could enter into my head – you know, suitable thought nuggets such as, “My, that pebbled leather really sets off the polished steel” or even, “Gosh, what a rambunctious pairing of old world and new” – all I could think was, “Gimme, gimme, gimme!”

Which could well be Apple’s marketing tagline, should they ever need one. Only they don’t. They’re doing just fine without one.

I suppose what I should really be thinking is: hmm… I already have an iPhone, iPad, iMac and iCreditcardbill, maybe I don’t need a wrist-wrapping version as well? But I’m not. Because evolution waits for no man. Or woman, for that matter. Technology – by its very nature – is constantly updating itself. It’s the most excellent inorganic example of Darwinism there is. Stay still for too long and you’re the guy with the Nokia 3310 who everyone else is scoffing at over their almond milk chai.

It’s not retro, it’s just awkward.

Of course, the Hermès version starts at $1700 to the Watch Sport’s $349, so it’s a significant jump. But this is the version you’ll see in the frow at fashion week and on the sleek wrists of starlets in their Instagram photos. Whether they sell them by the squillions or not isn’t really the point – rather, this is the product equivalent of that time Kanye West and Paul McCartney recorded a song together. By pairing the most recognisable consumer technology company on the planet with what is arguably the most respectable luxury label in the world, brand association is solidified. Apple have the watch you want. Even if you can’t afford the fancy one.

Not to be completely overshadowed, Apple also announced the iPhone 6s and 6s Plus (the 3D touch feature is the new hero here), iPad Pro with Apple Pencil and Smart Keyboard, new gold and rose gold models of the Apple Watch Sport, and new and improved Apple TV.

If Darwin was still alive, you can bet he’d be the first in line.

Written by Emma Markezic

Emma is a Sydney-based writer, columnist and comedian.

With a particular flair for lifestyle and pop culture, she has written columns for Sunday Style, Grazia, OK! and many more, with her incredibly popular monthly column for Cosmopolitan magazine syndicated to several countries around the world.

She’s also written for many of the country’s biggest magazine titles including Vogue, Cleo, InStyle, Shop Til You Drop, Stonefox, Madison, FHM, OK!, Who, Famous, Dolly, Girlfriend and body&soul in The Sunday Telegraph.

Emma is also an accomplished stand-up comedian, having performed at the Melbourne International Comedy Festival, Adelaide Fringe Festival and Sydney Comedy Festival, among others. Other notable accolades her role as one of the key cast in the Logie-nominated SBS show Comedy School in 2010, for which she won the ‘rising star’ category in Cosmopolitan’s Women of The Year Awards.

Emma also works as an MC and social commentator, providing quips and reviews for mX newspaper, various ABC radio outlets around the country and on morning television shows on a regular basis, as well as hosting duties for corporate and media outlets such as the 2014 Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week’s Style Sessions.

Having been an ambassador for brands such as SKII, Cricket Australia and Cointreau – and created sponsored content for the likes of Cartier, Nissan and ING Direct – you can also see her musings on thecarousel.com.

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